Understanding how to apply restorative practices to everyday classroom challenges is essential for successful implementation. The following examples illustrate how traditional disciplinary situations can be transformed through a trauma-informed restorative approach.
Situation 1: Disruptive Talking During Instruction
Traditional Response: The teacher publicly reprimands students for talking, assigns detention, or employs a progressive discipline system with warnings and consequences.
Trauma-Informed Restorative Response:
- In the moment: Use a calm, neutral signal to pause the lesson. Take a deep breath to ensure your own regulation before responding.
- Immediate approach: “I notice there’s a lot of side conversation happening. I’m feeling concerned because it’s making it difficult for everyone to focus on our learning. Let’s take a quick regulation break—30 seconds of deep breathing—and then continue.”
- Follow-up (after class with involved students): “I noticed you were having a hard time focusing during our lesson today. What was happening for you at that time?” [Listen fully to the student’s perspective] “When conversations happen during instruction, it affects our whole learning community. How do you think it impacts others when this happens?” “What do you need to help you stay engaged during lessons?” “What’s a plan we could make together that would support your learning while respecting everyone’s need to focus?”
- Integration of neuroscience: “Sometimes our brains get stuck in a chatty gear. When that happens, it helps to use a regulation strategy to reset. Which strategy might work for you when you notice the urge to talk during lessons?”
- Documentation and follow-through: Document the conversation and agreed-upon strategies. Check in with the student after a few days to see how the strategies are working and what adjustments might be needed.
A middle school teacher who implemented this approach shared: “Instead of playing whack-a-mole with talking students, I started having these brief restorative conversations. One student revealed he couldn’t see the board clearly but was embarrassed to say so. Another was struggling with medication timing that affected his impulse control. These insights led to meaningful solutions rather than just temporary compliance.”
Situation 2: Conflict Between Students During Group Work
Traditional Response: Separate the students, assign blame, impose consequences, or simply tell them to “work it out” without providing tools.
Trauma-Informed Restorative Response:
- In the moment: Notice early signs of conflict escalation. Approach calmly and invite the students to step aside for a brief check-in while other groups continue working.
- Immediate approach: “I notice things seem tense in your group. Let’s take a moment to understand what’s happening and find a way forward.”
- Facilitated conversation: “Let’s take turns sharing what’s happening from each perspective. One person speaks at a time, and then we’ll switch.” Guide students through the core restorative questions:
- “What happened from your perspective?”
- “How were you feeling at that time?”
- “How do you think this situation affected others in your group?”
- “What do you need now to move forward productively?”
- “What agreements can you make with each other about how to work together for the rest of this project?”
- Integration of trauma awareness: Watch for signs of dysregulation during the conversation. If a student shows indicators of entering fight/flight/freeze response (rapid breathing, flushed face, shutting down), pause the conversation and offer a brief regulation break: “Let’s take a minute to breathe and reset before continuing.”
- Reconnection strategy: After agreements are made, offer a concrete way to reestablish positive connection: “Before you return to your work, please share one thing you appreciate about working with each other, despite this challenge.”
An elementary teacher reflected: “Using this process transformed how my students handled group work conflicts. They began recognizing tension earlier and even started using the restorative questions independently. One day I overheard a student say to another, ‘I feel frustrated when you take over because I don’t get to contribute my ideas. What can we do differently?'”
Situation 3: Chronic Assignment Avoidance or Incomplete Work
Traditional Response: Punitive grading, detention to complete work, messages about “responsibility,” or referrals to administration for defiance.
Trauma-Informed Restorative Response:
- Preparation: Rather than assuming willful non-compliance, approach the situation with curiosity about what barriers might be present. Schedule a private conversation in a non-threatening setting.
- Opening the conversation: “I’ve noticed you haven’t been completing assignments lately, and I’m concerned because I want you to succeed in this class. I’m wondering what might be getting in the way?”
- Listening for understanding: Use active listening to understand potential barriers:
- Learning difficulties that make the work overwhelming
- Home situations that limit time or space for schoolwork
- Emotional barriers like anxiety or depression
- Pattern of avoidance due to fear of failure
- Lack of connection to the academic content
- Collaborative problem-solving: “Let’s think together about what might help. What would make this work more manageable for you?” “What resources or supports do you need to be successful?” “How could we modify the expectations while still ensuring you’re learning the essential content?”
- Creating accountability with support: Develop a concrete plan with built-in check-ins and scaffolded steps toward independent completion. Ensure the plan addresses the actual barriers identified rather than imposing a one-size-fits-all solution.
- Connection before correction: Find opportunities to strengthen your relationship with the student through positive interactions unrelated to academic performance. These connections build the relational trust necessary for academic engagement.
A high school English teacher shared this experience: “One of my students hadn’t turned in assignments for weeks. Instead of zeroes and detention, I invited him to lunch to talk. He revealed his parents were going through a divorce, and he was staying at different houses with no consistent place to do homework. We created a plan where he could use my classroom during lunch or after school. Within two weeks, he was catching up on assignments and eventually became one of my most engaged students.”
Situation 4: Damage to Classroom Property or Materials
Traditional Response: Identifying the “culprit,” requiring payment for damages, referral for vandalism, removing privileges from entire class if individual responsibility isn’t established.
Trauma-Informed Restorative Response:
- Initial discovery: When damage is discovered, address it matter-of-factly without accusation or emotional charge: “I notice our classroom library books have been torn. This affects our whole community since we all use these materials.”
- Community circle process: Hold a brief circle addressing the situation: “Our classroom belongs to all of us, and we need to understand what happened to our materials.” “How does this situation affect our learning community?” “What needs to happen to make things right?” This approach creates space for students responsible to acknowledge their actions without public shaming. It also prevents the adversarial dynamic of teacher-as-detective trying to identify culprits.
- Private follow-up: If students take responsibility during or after the circle, meet privately to understand the behavior: “What was happening for you when this occurred?” “How were you feeling at that time?” “When you think about it now, what impact did your actions have?”
- Meaningful repair: Work with the student to develop a plan for genuine repair that goes beyond financial restitution:
- Helping repair or replace damaged materials
- Creating a presentation for classmates about caring for shared resources
- Developing a system to better organize and maintain classroom materials
- Writing letters of apology to those affected
- Look for underlying needs: Consider whether property damage might indicate unmet needs:
- Need for sensory input (provide alternative fidget options)
- Expression of anger or frustration (teach appropriate outlets)
- Attempt to gain attention or connection (create positive leadership opportunities)
A third-grade teacher described this outcome: “When our class plants were damaged, instead of trying to figure out ‘who did it,’ we held a circle about caring for our classroom environment. Two students later approached me privately to admit their involvement. They created beautiful signs about plant care and took on the role of ‘garden guardians’ for the rest of the year. The plants thrived, and so did the students’ sense of responsibility.”
Situation 5: Exclusion and Social Conflict Among Students
Traditional Response: Forcing students to apologize, mandating inclusion through teacher directive, punishing students for excluding others, or dismissing the situation as “just how kids are.”
Trauma-Informed Restorative Response:
- Notice patterns with curiosity: Observe social dynamics without immediately intervening. Look for patterns of who is excluded and in what contexts.
- Individual check-in with excluded student: “I’ve noticed that there have been some challenges during [specific time/activity]. What has that experience been like for you?” “How are you feeling about your connections in our classroom?” “What would help you feel more included and valued in our community?”
- Circle process addressing community values: Hold a community circle (without singling out specific situations) addressing belonging: “What does it mean to belong to our classroom community?” “How does it feel when you’re included? When you’re excluded?” “What responsibilities do we have to each other as community members?” “What agreements could we make to ensure everyone feels valued and included?”
- Small group restorative conference: If exclusion persists after addressing community values, facilitate a small conference with involved students: “I’ve noticed some challenges in how we’re including everyone in our activities. I’d like us to talk together about what’s happening and how we can make things better for everyone.” Use the restorative questions to guide the conversation, focusing on harm caused by exclusion without shaming students for their social choices.
- Integration of trauma awareness: Recognize that both excluding and excluded students may be operating from trauma responses:
- Students who exclude others may be seeking control or safety through social dominance
- Excluded students may have social skills deficits related to early attachment disruptions
- Both may benefit from explicit teaching of social skills and emotional regulation
- Structured inclusion opportunities: Create structured activities that mix social groups and build new connections without forcing inauthentic friendships:
- Intentional grouping for collaborative projects
- Classroom jobs that pair different students
- Circle activities that help students discover unexpected common connections
- Use playful, low-risk social games (e.g. “Find someone who…” or “Would you rather?” circles) to gently shift social dynamics. Prioritise inclusion not as a rule but as a relational value.
Follow-up and monitoring
After the circle or conference, continue checking in with both excluded and excluding students. Look for positive changes and reinforce growth with affirming feedback. If issues persist, revisit the conversation and consider involving support staff such as a school counsellor or social worker.
A Year 5 teacher reflected:
“One student was constantly left out of playground games. Instead of shaming the group, we talked about what it means to be a team. Later, we introduced a rotating ‘game captain’ role that included everyone in decision-making. Not only did inclusion improve, but the students became more self-aware and supportive.”
Final Thoughts: Restorative Mindsets, Not Just Methods
Each of these five situations shows how restorative practices, when paired with trauma-informed insight, move the focus from control to connection, from punishment to purpose, and from blame to belonging. These aren’t just techniques—they’re expressions of a deeper classroom philosophy rooted in dignity, relationship, and growth.
While it may feel overwhelming at first to replace ingrained habits with new relational approaches, educators consistently report that restorative work leads to:
- Stronger relationships with students
- Reduced behavioural incidents over time
- Improved student self-awareness and regulation
- A more compassionate, engaged classroom culture
In the words of restorative educator and author Margaret Thorsborne, “It’s not about being soft—it’s about being smart with our humanity.”
Five Guiding Tips for Sustained Practice
- Start with yourself – Model regulation, humility, and repair in your own actions.
- Practice daily – Use mini-circles, affective statements, and check-ins to keep relational norms visible.
- Stay curious – Behaviours often mask needs. Seek to understand before reacting.
- Document growth – Keep simple notes on strategies and progress. Celebrate small wins.
- Build collective responsibility – Frame your classroom as a community, not a hierarchy.
Suggested Reading:
- Hopkins, B. (2011). The Restorative Classroom: Using Restorative Approaches to Foster Effective Learning.
- Thorsborne, M., & Blood, P. (2013). Implementing Restorative Practices in Schools: A Practical Guide.
- Brunzell, T., Stokes, H., & Waters, L. (2021). Becoming a Trauma-Informed Restorative Educator.
- Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma.
- Zehr, H. (2015). The Little Book of Restorative Justice.
By weaving these responses into the daily fabric of your classroom, you’re not just managing behaviour—you’re shaping the emotional and relational intelligence of the next generation.
